Bad Habits You Pick Up As A Parent

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As parents you can begin to live in a bit of a bubble. What becomes normal to you may appear slightly strange, random or a tad crazy to the outside world. I’ve compiled a list below of bad habits that I’ve picked up so far along the way…

bad habits

  • OTT mouth actions when your child is eating. You simply can’t help it, even in public, even when you’re irritating yourself.
  • Expressively mouthing the words to songs, common phrases, pretty much anything your child says predictably. God help me during school plays.
  • Making silly noises to your child to entertain them and continuing to do so when they’re no longer in your presence i.e. walking down the street, at work etc.
  • Singing theme tunes from kids shows in public.
  • Being overly cautious. Walking an inch behind your child everywhere she goes whilst rambling “Be careful, don’t do that. Be careful” along the way.
  • Announcing to a room full of people “I’m just nipping for a wee wee” or asking someone “Do you need a wee?”
  • Beckoning your child with a whistle or pat of the knee.
  • Blindly eating leftovers from your child’s plate even when it’s been half chewed.
  • Being protective/biased of your child and justifying their behaviour: “She won’t have pushed him for nothing”, “She’s just tired” or “I think she’s teething”
  • Inadvertently lying to your spouse about the last time you changed/fed your child as the days blurred into one and you’re just pleased you’ve both survived.
  • Comparing your child to others, in your head your child is always going to be the best and even when they’re not, there’s a reason.
  • Looking forward to your next visit to the toilet as it’s the only place you get a bit of peace. Being secretly grateful when your child insists on hounding your partner during their toilet time. More peace!
  • Pretending to be asleep when your child wakes in the night, followed by pretending to be asleep when your partner nudges you to respond to said child.
  • Giving in to your child’s demands for an ice lolly/tiny smartie/’weeties just for an easy ride when you no longer have the energy to negotiate with a two-year-old.
  • Discussing children’s characters with your mates on a night out and getting irrationally angry about said characters personality flaws.
  • Being overly animated in responses to your child and allowing this to filter into adult life. Colleague: “I’ve got a sausage sarnie for my dinner” Me: “Wow! Great choice!” *claps loudly*
  • Oversharing with people that don’t really care about your child’s achievements that day. Me: “She’s had a wee on her potty” Postman: “Okay”
  • Forgetting vital items when leaving the house. My coat, The pram, nappies, food for child, drink for child, car keys, wallet, child’s coat, my coat. Humblebrag: I always remember the baby.

What interesting habits have you picked up as a parent? Pop them in the comments below…

4 thoughts on “Bad Habits You Pick Up As A Parent”

  1. Brilliant!

    Wee-nouncement and then hiding in the toilet for a bit are top of the list for me lol!

    I find I give less of a crap about bring self conscious now though. I’ll happily speak to bubba in motherease or belt the wheels on the bus out loud in public, apart from when he is having a melt down in which case I panic like I only have 10 seconds left in a crystal maze task.

    I’d also add muttering f*ck this/it under my breath to the list too lol.

    Good read mate!
    Emil

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